Funny Stories

Posted on 7 November 2018


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny stories updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me.

"Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked.

"It sure is," I replied.

Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van.

Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

-- Story submitted by Bob Hughes   [Funny Stories]



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Tech Support

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK.
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer : Yes.
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah... that one does work...

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

-- Story submitted by ghost   [Funny Stories]



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Idiot Sighting

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.

She said, "You gave me too much money."

I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back."

She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said, "We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing."

The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

-- Story submitted by JJJ   [Funny Stories]



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When Mary was pregnant, her five-year-old son, Billy, was utterly amazed and a little bit disbelieving that his sister was growing in his mom's tummy.

So one day when the baby was especially active, she asked Billy to place his tiny hands on her tummy to feel the baby kick. But when he did, the baby was suddenly still.

"Oh, Billy, she must have decided to take a nap," shrugged his mother.

"A nap?" Billy marveled. "You mean there's a bed in there too?"

-- Story submitted by Keira Tooker   [Funny Stories]



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I work as a site tech for a large elementary school. One day I get a call that this teacher's assistant is having trouble with the computer mouse. I needed to head to that part o the campus anyway, so I threw a new mouse in my service bag - thinking of course that maybe the one that wasn't working had died - and headed over to the trouble.

When I walk in the door of the classroom it's all I can do to "stay professional". The user has her back to me, sitting at the computer in perfect form, waving the mouse around ABOVE the mouse pad.

After a few minutes of attempting to gain my composure, I walk over to the user with tears in my eyes and explain proper mousing procedures.

-- Story submitted by ghost   [Funny Stories]



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