Funny Stories

Posted on 17 March 2018


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny stories updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

My husband cut himself and was treated in the emergency room. Afterwards, he returned to the waiting room and I asked what kind of follow-up the doctor had prescribed. With a totally straight face, he read from the printed sheet: "Take it easy, be waited on and have sex twice a day."

At that, another man sitting nearby jumped up and exclaimed, "Whatever he's got, I want!"

-- Story submitted by Victoria Howe   [Funny Stories]



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For several years, I had been trying to convince my husband that he should do more cardiovascular exercise. One day, he announced that he was going golfing at our local course and that he was going to walk instead of riding in a cart. I thought this was a good start to getting in shape and that my nagging was finally paying off.

When he came back, he walked into the house moaning and groaning over how much his back and his legs hurt.

"What does that tell you?" I asked.

He replied, "It tells me I should have taken the cart!"

-- Story submitted by Nancy   [Funny Stories]



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A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer.

After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. So he told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but he refused and said, "I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because he didn't believe him.

At this point the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over, agreed that the man was in fact over 21 he put the scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot.

The cashier promptly called the police and gave them the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.

-- Story submitted by Lana Pammer   [Funny Stories]



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In Zaire it has been found that the rare Pygmy chimpanzees have an amazing sexual appetite which outranks even the rabbit. They have been seen having sex in all different ways including males with males and females with females. It seems that sex is their main form of communication although the downside is that they can become very neurotic and some can die instantly of fright.

Female Pygmy Chimps often manipulate males by luring them into sex and then stealing their food.

-- Story submitted by Samanta White   [Funny Stories]



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