Funny Stories

Posted on 22 March 2019


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny stories updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars I conduct as an educational psychologist. The elderly woman sitting next to me explained that she was returning to Miami after having spent two weeks visiting her six children, 18 grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren in Boston. Then she inquired what I did for a living.

I told her, fully expecting her to question me for free professional advice.

Instead she sat back, picked up a magazine and said, "If there's anything you want to know, just ask me."

-- Story submitted by Jennifer Kent   [Funny Stories]



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My husband and I took our two-year-old daughter to the home-improvement store. Madison got tired of walking, so my husband let her ride on his shoulders. As he walked, Madison began pulling his hair. Although he asked her to stop several times, she kept on. Getting annoyed, he scolded, "Madison! Stop that!"

"But, Daddy," she replied, "I'm just trying to get my gum back."

-- Story submitted by Monica Burt   [Funny Stories]



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I got my first speeding ticket. Looking it over, I was surprised to see that the officer listed my height accurately despite never having seen me standing. I complimented his uncanny ability and asked if it was part of police training.

He then informed me that he read it on my license.

-- Story submitted by Kevin   [Funny Stories]



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Hitting on the novel idea that he could end his wife's incessant nagging by giving her a good scare, Hungarian Jake Fen built an elaborate harness to make it look as if he had hanged himself.

When his wife came home and saw him she fainted. Hearing a disturbance a neighbor came over and, finding what she thought were two corpses, seized the opportunity to loot the place. As she was leaving the room, her arms laden, the outraged and suspended Mr. Fen kicked her stoutly in the backside. This so surprised the lady that she dropped dead of a heart attack.

Happily, Mr. Fen was acquitted of manslaughter and he and his wife were reconciled.

-- Story submitted by Colin Bowyer   [Funny Stories]



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I have nothing against Mac devices or intelligent people who actually know how to use them. It just seems that some of the most problematic ID-10-T's out there that are tech savy to an extent and have an attitude problem always have a Mac as their main system. I am not a Mac guy, but I can still do some basic stuff nonetheless. This one time, a visitor had come on site and wanted Wi-Fi access on their macbook. In special cases we sometimes allow them a connection to a segmented internet connection. We do not leave it wide open and require people to apply for temporary access. Upon being introduced, he immediately began to lecture me about not having our wi-fi open for anyone to access. After 5 minutes of hot air being blown my way, I was finally able to get a some words in. The conversation went something like this.

User - I cannot understand how you can even justify password protecting your wireless network.

Me - It it locked down for security reasons. This is a private business network, and we are not a wi-fi hotspot for anyone to just sit down and use.

U - Anyone who can use wi-fi should be able to get on the internet when they want.

M - We are not an ISP, and it is good practice to use security. Do you have wi-fi at home?

U - Yes

M - Do you let everyone on it?

U - No, I put a password on it.

M - Why would you do that if everyone should have access to the internet when they want?

U - Because I pay for it and they should get their own.

M - Okay, so tell me again why I should have my network wide open for you to use?

U - Well, some places let you do use their internet whenever you want.

M - Well, we are not Starbucks.

Honestly I don't know what it is about the Mac user superiority complex, but they seem to expect everything handed to them for free and all lack the proper understanding for anything considered a standard practice or rule.

-- Story submitted by ghost   [Funny Stories]



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