Funny Stories

Posted on 20 April 2017


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny stories updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

Our young daughter had adopted a stray cat. To my distress, he began to use the back of our new sofa as a scratching post. "Don't worry," my husband reassured me. "I'll have him trained in no time."

I watched for several days as my husband patiently "trained" our new pet. Whenever the cat scratched, my husband deposited him outdoors to teach him a lesson.

The cat learned quickly. For the next 16 years, whenever he wanted to go outside, he scratched the back of the sofa!!

-- Story submitted by Sandra Karo   [Funny Stories]



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I was traveling home on the train from Newcastle to Glasgow and I was sitting with a group of people who, through no fault of their own, had recently been traveling in the first class carriage. They told me of this incident which occurred while they were living the high life with their complimentary coffee and biscuits.

Apparently there had been a woman on the train with a small dog. When the ticket inspector came round he told her she'd have to buy a ticket for her dog. Understandably galled, she replied that if she was paying for a ticket for the dog, the dog would be entitled to a seat of it's own. The ticket collector graciously agreed but on one condition; he pointed to the sign by the window and said, "just as long as he keeps his feet off the seat."

-- Story submitted by Ian D.   [Funny Stories]



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This is my second marriage and I've learned, grown. If we have a fight, before we go to bed I always say three little words, "I love you."

If that doesn't work I say two little words: "Community property."

-- Story submitted by Betsy   [Funny Stories]



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I had a job interview with an up-and-coming company that was working on expanding their local network. After grilling me for half an hour, this very nice woman told me that if they offered me a position, I'd be "working on the client-server side of the network."

I managed not to laugh at that, but I left the room wondering how many of me they planned to hire.

-- Story submitted by ghost   [Funny Stories]



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